We Can’t Blame The Gun This Time

I knew it would happen, I just thought it would happen after stiffer gun laws came into effect. Another disgruntled young male went on a killing spree. What will be blamed this time?

The people who are staunchly advocating for tougher gun laws will say at least there are not as many deaths with a knife compared to deaths when a gun is used.

I agree the US needs some stiffer gun laws or the laws that already exist need fine tuning and properly enforced, especially the need for training and proper licensing.

In Canada a hand gun requires a different license and a 5 day waiting period from the day the gun is bought to the day the purchaser can take possession (with the first hand gun, after that the person can purchase and take as many hand guns as he wants).
There is a 30 day waiting period for license approval. But once you have your license you can purchase a rifle with no wait.

We also have laws pertaining to the storage of fire arms; which requires they be stored in a locked gun case, be decommissioned or have a trigger lock. But this law would not have prevented Nikolas Cruz, his gun was in a locked gun case. Under Canadian gun laws the Vegas shooter would not have been stopped either. I am unsure what the laws in Canada have to say about the fact that Nikolas Cruz advertised on Facebook for months prior to actually shooting up the school. I think that comes down to society in general ignoring a potential time bomb until it blew. In my opinion the responsibility lies on the shoulders of the mental health professionals and police.

You can ban bump stocks or large magazines but that won’t prevent them from existing and being purchased illegally. A legal gun can be modified; Google it.

If someone wants to kill they are not concerned about doing it legally; think about it.

As was just shown with the recent school stabbings in PA stricter gun laws is not going to stop school violence. 21 students are injured, some very seriously, deaths are yet to be determined. Sure there are not as many deaths as in Florida, but even one death is too many.

Guns, knives, bombs, vehicles, are all tools a person can use to kill enmass.
After Canada brought in stiffer gun laws the homicide rate for guns did drop. But interestingly enough the over all rate of homicides AND suicides went up. So stiffer laws on guns only prevented deaths using a gun NOT deaths.

It only makes sense to me that instead of eliminating the means, we need to look at the CAUSE. Guns do not CAUSE deaths, it is the person holding the gun who is doing the killing.

Why aren’t people asking WHY!? why are young men (its not women doing the killing) so angry they feel mass murder is the solution?

Could it be that every single mass shooter, adult or youth, has been on some prescription psychiatric drug for either depression or ADHD commonly known as SSRI’s?
It is a multi faceted problem that needs to be addressed at the cause.

My mother has had a leak in her kitchen for 30 years. Every time it rains when the wind is blowing a certain direction her kitchen gets a puddle. It appeared to be coming from the skylight. She has hired numerous contractors to fix the leak. They caulk here, reseal there, and think they have it fixed. It has appeared fixed for a year or more; until the wind is blowing in just the right direction during a rain storm and my mom walks into her kitchen to another puddle. She is at her wits end about the problem, the gyproc is now falling away from the ceiling there is no way of hiding the damage any more and the leak is getting worse. My brother and my son (my son was 4 when she moved into the house and it leaked, he is 34 now) are both highly respected in the construction industry and they have both worked on the leak and thought they had it fixed, but no such luck. It leaked again this winter. You can keep patching it again and again and you can patch the drywall and it looks fixed but it will eventually leak again. Until you find the source of the leak the problem won’t go away and the source of the leak may not be where you think it is. Water can travel a long way from the original source of the leak.

To assume guns are the cause of mass shootings is like patching the leak in a roof without finding the source of the leak.

I am not saying that the SSRI’s are totally to blame either; I think it is a combination of factors contributing to the bigger problem.

I AM saying; find the source, and you will be able to fix the problem.

Making Of A Mass Murderer – Part 2

For some reason this last shooting in the states hit me harder than any of the others. Lets face it; in the states, mass shootings have become almost a daily occurrence and after a while you hear the news and think “Oh another shooting, gee that’s too bad” then go on with your day. I live in Canada, we don’t have a problem with mass shootings, we don’t have a beef with the NRA, so what do I care?

Guns have always been around with far less stringent gun laws and mass shooting, teens killing teens was not happening. This has led me on an investigation to figure out what has changed in recent decades to make teens angry enough they would violently kill their peers. Angry teens is nothing new, all the hormones, peer pressure, the need to be popular. And lets be honest, I am not trying to blame the victims, but kids can be cruel. (seen it, experienced it, got the T-shirt)

Then I heard the kid was 18, that his father had died when he was 8 and his mother died last year. A knot formed in my stomach. I thought of what I was going through with my son when he was 18; I honestly didn’t think he would live to 21. He would either end up killing someone, be killed, or end up in jail. My son laughs at me now and says “Oh Momma, I wasn’t that bad.” Oh yes he was. And I couldn’t help wondering what he would have done if I would have died when he was 18.

That got me thinking about what Nikolas Cruz’s childhood might have been like, what drove him to do what he did. Maybe I was wrong to feel sorry for him but I had to try to figure it out.

I know one thing for certain; getting rid of the guns is not going to solve the problem. I agree that it may save a few lives, it will force kids to be more creative in their killing sprees, we might see more bombings or vehicles running over groups of people, but it isn’t going to solve the cause of the problem. In one forum I was in someone was spouting off about China not having any shootings because they don’t allow guns. No they don’t have shootings, they have stabbings and machete attacks and the US is no different. For decades kids have been coming to school with knives and attacking someone they have a beef with and then they kill themselves. This is not just about mass shootings, it can’t be isolated like that; this is about school violence, it is about society, it’s about asking when and why did the human life stop having value? Why are our teens committing suicide, bullying, and killing at an alarming rate?

I was raised with guns in the home and I know that simply having a gun available to you does not make you a killer. I have also done a lot of work with domestic violence victims and been one myself, and found it interesting that the #1 sign that the abuser is capable of murdering the victim is if he has strangled her. My ex could blow a vehicle up from yards away using a length of wire, barbecue starter, a balloon and cutting gas. If someone wants to kill you, they don’t need a gun and a gun does not make them into a killer.

But before I go any further lets look at the common traits of these teens;

Children and Adolescent Shooters

  • over 60% wet the bed past the age of 12 years old. (bed wetting is a common sign a child is being or has been sexually abused)
  • Had a fascination with fire and may have a history of arson
  • Often from dysfunctional families with an absentee father
  • Childhood abuse
  • Were bullied
  • History of attempted suicide
  • Become a loner due to feelings of alienation from their peers
  • Every single young mass shooter was on some psychiatric drug
  • They are our future domestic abusers and mass murderers.

We don’t hear about the kid being medicated for ADHD, just his troubled past.

“Approximately 11% of children 4-17 years of age (6.4 million) have ever been diagnosed with ADHD, according to parent report from 2011-12. [Read key findings] The percent of children with an ADHD diagnosis continued to increase, from 7.8% in 2003 to 9.5% in 2007 and to 11.0% in 2011-12.Jan 24, 2018”

“Twelve percent of US children and teens had a diagnosis of Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) in 2011, a number that has jumped by 43 percent since 2003, according to a large national study based on parental reports of an ADHD diagnosis.”

I am not saying that in some cases drugs might be necessary, I am not a psychiatrist but I strongly believe that there are alternatives that could be tried but drugs are easier and quicker and makes the drug manufacturers money.  It makes teacher’s lives easier; it’s hard for teachers to control a classroom of children if some of them don’t sit quietly and I understand the teachers frustration, there isn’t the time to teach each student the way that they need to learn.

We all learn differently. We are all unique, something that I personally love. I love when a person isn’t afraid to be who they are instead of being a “sheep” but not everyone appreciates uniqueness, it scares them and in school especially; it really is not appreciated.

In my opinion, we are too quick to label children with some disorder before they even have a chance to develop their personality, any child who is high energy and perhaps even highly intelligent is labeled as being ADHD, ADD, OCD and we drug them into compliance. I am appalled that children as young as 2 are being labeled disordered when they just might have a unique personality that needs to be directed and taught in a way they can relate to.

The school recommended my son be put on Ritalil when he was in elementary school in the late 80’s and I flatly refused. I was told it was a miracle drug for helping children learn. When I knew it was more about getting kids to comply and behave; making the teachers life so much easier. I was pressured quite strongly and even made to feel guilty, that I could make my son’s life so much easier by putting him on a drug that would help him concentrate. I literally called Bullshit and walked out.

I had kids in my daycare as young as 7 on Ritalil and to be honest they were the worst behaved and the meanest kids. I had step children that were put on it and it just deadened their personalities. I had to comply with the mom’s wishes but I hated the effect it had on the kids. None of them were on it long and none of them liked how they felt on it. Every single kid I have known on ADHD drugs had dead eyes. I hate the frickin stuff and what I have uncovered just reinforces what I have always felt. You don’t drug kids into compliance!

Anti-depressants and drugs for ADHD are all from the category of SSRI drugs or Serotonin selective reuptake inhibitors

Side effects of anti depressants and drugs for ADHD

loss of appetite, weight loss, sleep problems, irritability, hallucinations, confusion, and tics, insomnia, increase the risk of cardiac and psychiatric problems, an increased risk of suicideExtreme Agitation    Hostility & Aggression,  Withdrawal Reactions   ,  Other Side Effects, Autism,   Paxil Suicide

“As one well-known psychiatrist put it: “[SSRIs] are not correcting a biochemical imbalance, these drugs create severe imbalances in the brain. … The idea that human suffering, psychological suffering, is biochemical is strictly a promotional campaign, perhaps the most successful in the history of the world, created by the drug companies. We do not even have a technology, a scientific technology, for measuring what happens inside the brain … it is literally a fabrication.””

“For the existing indications SSRI manufacturers make over Six Billion Dollars ($6,000,000,000) per year from SSRIs.”

In 2006 the FDA required drug manufacturers to carry a “Blackbox Warning” on all anti-depressants because of the serious side effects and subsequent law suits and criminal cases where it was determined that the person committed murder or some other violent crime while under the influence of an SSRI and got off.

They recommend anyone taking an SSRI have a face to face meeting with their doctor and that family and friends closely monitor the patient.

First of all who has the time or money for weekly doctors appointment?

Secondly; who reads the small print on their medications?

Thirdly (is that a word?)People trust their doctor to inform them of side effects and to book follow up appointments.

Finally; the doctors themselves don’t know all the side effects and the majority tend to prescribe more medication to counter act the side effects of the first meds. There are interactions like with cough syrup that could send a patient into SSRI toxicity. How many kids need cough syrup?

I know this because of my own recent experiences with medication for my heart, the wrong meds all but killed me, yet the doctors kept insisting it was not the meds. It was not until I told them I was taking myself off them because life was not worth living while on them; that I got their attention and they found an alternative drug and the change was almost immediate and my health improved so quickly I went from being told I needed a heart transplant to going from a 1.5 grading to 10.5.

Most people don’t deal with the medical profession for anything more than a common cold and ADHD has become so common I am sure parents assume it is perfectly safe because if it wasn’t there would have been more information out there about it. The number of children who commit suicide or violent crimes is not tracked in terms of the drugs they were on and they are just chalked up to “the child was depressed” or the child “had behavior problems”

I am sure in most cases the children end up being ok taking the medication and grow up without incident. But what about the 1% who have adverse effects and slip through the cracks?
What about the kid, who on top of being medicated is bullied, and because of the drugs starts to get paranoid, has feelings of aggression he doesn’t know how to deal with, throw into the mix the boy’s father dies and the mother is grieving and not able to handle the child as well. Now the child is dealing with feelings of grief, being bullied, has no one to talk to and maybe is just dismissed by all the adults dealing with their own issues (adults rarely give children credit for their emotions and tend to dismiss them because they are just kids) What does a kid do if he has feelings he doesn’t know how to deal do? they either isolate themselves or they act out. Can you see the vicious cycle starting? THEN!
The drugs are doing exactly what they are intended to due, dull his feelings, and by every definition the person becomes a narcissist, no empathy, no love, just hatred and anger.
The kid, being bullied grows angrier, adults are always angry with him, kids withdraw from him because he is angry and they can’t relate to losing their dad, (or as in my son’s case, his dad just chose to not be in his life and criticize him when he did see him the odd time, cancelled daddy days and generally disappointed the kid time after time). The kid isolates himself and buries himself on the internet, sees other kids great lives on Facebook, those popular kids who want nothing to do with him. He ruminates about it, all alone, day after day and gets more and more angry. He doesn’t know how to release his angry in a healthy way or how to communicate in a constructive way and he builds deeper pathways in his brain so that even if he doesn’t want to, all he can think about is how no one cares, rejects him, dismisses him, is angry with him and how unfair life is. Then his mother gets sick and dies. He is alone, homeless, kicked out of school, no one understands him, he doesn’t understand himself, even his own little brother teased him.
There had been thirty 911 calls made about Nikolas Cruz since 2016. One call was made by his mother because he had gotten angry and was throwing things and hit her with the vacuum hose, his therapist had attended the home with the police. The therapist had given him drugs, he had calmed down so they said there was no need to take him in for assessment. His mother had said he was becoming more irate over time, talking more about wanting a gun, cutting himself and generally exhibiting progressively scarier behavior. He had called 911 himself to report being bullied just days after his mother died. Yet nothing was done.  As much as what he did is horrific, it can not be chalked up to “he slipped through the cracks”. The boy was screaming for help and warning people what he was planning to do long before he did it and no one listened, sadly he has everyone’s attention now! So, the truth of the matter is; his feelings were dismissed, he wasn’t taken seriously, he was given more of the drugs that were making him even more angry, paranoid and violent.  In my mind, society failed this boy is such a huge way, and it has to stop before any more kids die.

Society, media, TV, video games, movies and music all associate violence with masculinity. Boys are told to “man up”, don’t be a sissy, if they cry, girls naturally know how to express sadness but boys are expected to be tough, they end up dealing with all their feelings one way, with anger and aggression.

There are narcissists and psychopaths who are born that way, and they can not be helped and are very dangerous; but most of these kids are created by society.

I have to ask too, how many of the kids being prescribed medication are truly ADHD? There are many prescribed tests doctors should be doing to determine if there is some other cause for the child’s behavior.

To rule out other conditions, a doctor may ask for tests (but how many do?), including:

Hearing and eyesight
A blood test for lead levels
A blood test for diseases such as thyroid disease
A test to measure electrical activity in the brain
A CT scan or MRI to check for brain abnormalities

The Vanderbilt Assessment Scale is a 55-question assessment tool that reviews symptoms of ADHD. It also looks for other conditions such as conduct disorder, oppositional-defiant disorder, anxiety, and depression.

The Behavior Assessment System for Children (BASC) is a test that looks for things like hyperactivity, aggression, and conduct problems. It also looks for anxiety, depression, attention and learning problems, as well as the lack of certain essential skills.

The Child Behavior Checklist/Teacher Report Form (CBCL) is a scale that looks at physical complaints, aggressive or delinquent behavior, and withdrawal.

The Neuropsychiatric EEG-Based Assessment Aid (NEBA) system is a scan that measures brain waves. The ratio of certain brain waves tends to be higher in children and adolescents with ADHD. The scan is approved for use in children ages 6 to 17, but is meant to be used as a part of a complete medical and psychological exam.

Other tests help diagnose other medical conditions that mimic ADHD, but don’t diagnose ADHD itself.

Look for my next post with my thoughts on how to stop raising narcissistic kids and mass murderers.


The Making Of A Mass Murderer – Part 1




Mass shooters are the ones we hear about the most but there are mass murderers who use other means; such as bombs, as with the Boston Marathon; or a combination of guns and bombs.

Before we go any further lets look at the trait of a mass shooter/murderer

  • Statistically, 90% of mass murderers are white males and between the age of 20-30 Women tend to see violence as a self-defense mechanism if there is no other way out.  
  • White entitlement combined with economic anxiety. White people are socialized into believing that they are the superior race, they have high expectations for their own success, and are less able to cope with loss when they fail to achieve that success
  • Lower to middle class upbringing
  • Most are single or divorced
  • Many are highly intelligent if not geniuses
  • Almost all of them have a history of domestic abuse.
    Violence toward the women in their lives was the first warning sign of what was to come. It’s too bad no one in power was listening, but then domestic violence is still not recognized for the problem it is, with 1 in 3 women experiencing domestic abuse in her lifetime
  • Tend to isolate themselves, often described as being a loner

Many newspapers refer to the shooter as a narcissist. I have 18 years experience with them and it just does not fit. Many disorders display narcissistic traits, we all have narcissistic traits, some times more than other times depending on what is going on in our lives. When a person feels they lack mutual aid and protection, they are more likely to become focused on their own interests and welfare. That is, they become more self-centered. I see it in victims of domestic abuse all the time. I think the shooter may be pushed to his emotional limit by whatever circumstances (usually a divorce, job loss, or death of a loved one) and becomes self-obsessed. Yes, he blames everyone else for his problems but a narcissist considers himself superior to others and doesn’t really concern himself with what people think of him. Shooters are motivated by feelings of inferiority.

The narcissist has learned from a very early age to mimic the emotions of others and tends to blend into society extremely well. He can morph into any personality he chooses at any time. A narcissist feels genuinely entitled to special treatment and has no concern for the people he hurts in his attempts to get the things he wants or thinks he needs.  They are very vengeful but generally seek revenge in covert ways and only kill when they think they are going to be exposed for what they really are or lose control over the situation. Narcissists feel they are too special to commit suicide or self harm, they are usually quite charismatic and rarely ever seek help from a counselor, they simply don’t think they have any flaws or blame.

Whereas the shooters have a history of going to therapists/psychiatrists, depression, self harm, suicide attempts, feelings of inadequacy, paranoia about people being against them, and have isolated themselves from society.  

Mass killers do not just ‘snap.’ – it is a slow build up over time, sometimes years

  • Diaries of some shooters revealed a common feeling of rejection, being dismissed, disrespected and devalued by a group, either the popular crowd at school; or work mates and seeking vengeance for this perceived or real maltreatment.
  • They become paranoid, resentful, suspicious and spend their time alone ruminating about all the ways they have been mistreated, growing more resentful as time goes on. The more we think about something the deeper it embeds in the brain.
    (I have seen this happen often with victims of narcissistic abuse. They can’t stop ruminating about the narcissist and what he is doing now. They literally drive themselves crazy and it seems totally out of their control, it is all they think about. What happens is; the pathways to the brain get so embedded it is all their brain can think about. It becomes a vicious cycle because the more they think about him the deeper those pathway become and the more they think about him. Time does not heal them, they end up a year later obsessing even more. The only way to end it is to consciously retrain the brain to think of other things. If you don’t know you can retrain your brain and you are focused on how people keep humiliating and rejecting you, you would eventually become totally paranoid which would drive people further away, compounding the problem.) Driving the shooter further into isolation.
  • They finally start to fantasize about getting violent revenge.

“We also could do a lot more to prevent these attacks with a far more robust mental health system, and especially with mental health care that focuses on addressing toxic forms of masculinity.” https://www.seeker.com/culture/behavior/mass-shootings-in-the-us-some-common-characteristics-of-the-men-that-kill

  • At this point they become a ticking time bomb so that when some major loss happens, the loss of a job or marriage break up, in Cruz’s case, his mother died
  • Social media is another huge contributor to the feelings of inadequacy. How many friends a person has, how many likes a person gets, online bullying, and the narcissistic fantasy world so many people project to live, plus the tendency for people to say things they would not say in person when they are behind a computer screen, all feed the shooter’s insecurities.

The further I investigated the more I was being led some where I had not really expected to go, but made total sense and led me to change the title of this post from Traits Of A Mass Shooter to The Making Of A Mass Shooter.

Everyone is blaming the NRA for the gun violence but there is one influencer far more powerful and with far more money than the NRA and that is Big Pharma.

I understand that people with mental illness battle the stigma attached to it and have suffered a lot of prejudice and misconception about things like Autism, Bi-Polar, Schizophrenia, simply going to a counselor can be cause for criticism. This post might not be too popular with some of those people but I am just reporting facts and what I know to be true from my experience and anyone is free to comment with a differing opinion as long as all comments are respectful and relevant.  I do believe people who have suicidal thoughts, spontaneous fits of rage or severe mood swings should probably not own a gun.

My personal experience with doctors is they are often quick to prescribe drugs because it is easier and I know damn well they are given perks for recommending certain drugs.  Even with my heart meds I had a hellish time for a year trying to convince the doctors that the side effects were so horrific I wanted to die, once I found a doctor who listened to me and changed my medication my health changed almost overnight. (and it was proven just last week when they read the printout from my defibrillator, on the old drugs in 6 months I had 84 heart episodes, 5 “events” and a major heart attack and they told me my only option was a heart transplant. After 6 months on the new meds, I had 1 episode, period). If you are mentally unstable you are not going to necessarily realize it is your drugs making you sick and doctors tend to just prescribe more drugs to counteract the other drugs.

Adding to the problem is, society has a “quick fix” mentality also, if you are still crying two weeks after your marriage ended friends are pretty quick to say “Maybe you should get something from the doctor just to get through this”, “You really need to just get over it and move on.” I have talked to enough victims of narcissistic abuse through my other blog www.ladywithatruck.com and I am constantly amazed how many of them are two weeks out and upset because they don’t feel like dating yet. I have had people suggest I get an anti-depressant at different times in my life. I see no point in medicating myself when I have every right to be depressed. If I had no reason to be depressed or stressed I could see it.

I think often times the side effects are worse than the illness.

With the Las Vegas shooter, they had not been able to come up with one common indicator or trait that fit the profile of a mass shooter, no domestic abuse, not known to police, had money, he was a preferred customer at the casino. An autopsy revealed Stephen Paddock had anti-anxiety drugs (benzodiazepines, commonly known to cause aggression) in his system.

The data on all mass shooters is incomplete because police have not been told to investigate the case from that angle and rumor has it, the people who did make the connection were quickly hushed. For sure Big Pharma does not want the truth to come out, there is a lot of money being made pushing anti-depressants and drugs like Ritalin. In every single one of the mass shooters or mass murderers, plus numerous singular homicides where the information was recorded; the shooter was on a psychiatric drug. There are over 30 cases of mass school violence where the shooter was either on or withdrawing from psychiatric drugs.

Don’t miss my next post on drugging our kids and making them into mass murderers.



American Psychiatric Association: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition.